I lost my little Tobey two weeks ago today. It was heart-wrenching. He was a young dog, only six years. Tobey was rescued from a puppy mill and was adopted through Precious Secrets Sheltie Rescue, a wonderful organization in Ohio.

My Tobey died from AIHA, an anemic disease which is just now being investigated and linked to vaccinations. Tobey died almost five weeks ago to the day following his rabies vaccination. If Tobey were here he would want Sheltie parents everywhere to know that this anemic disease could be prevented through a simple test called the Titers test. You see, it is suspected that AIHA is caused because not all dogs need to be vaccinated the same. Tobey had enough vaccination left in him and the Titers would have told us that. The vet has the test and if your vet does not, go to a different vet! While the race is on to prevent AIHA there will be speculation and that means valuable time lost. The vet can give you a waiver to avoid vaccinations if your dog has the proper amount of vaccine left in his or her system and it will be recognized by the state in which you live.

Often, as in the case of Tobey, there are no symptoms until it is too late. Those main symptoms are paleness in the whites of the eyes and gums. Lethargy and loss of appetite follow. Tobey had a history of skin infections, like yeast and many allergies, all of which my be contributors to this horrible disease. Ask many questions at your vet. Watch the medications given your pet. Ask about the Titers test.

Little Tobey, you came into our lives
and challenged us with your sad soul and dared us to love you.
Mommy and Daddy did just that.
You will be missed, little sad-faced boy,
for forever.
You touched our hearts more than you will ever know.

Kate Dierks

"Koa"

July 1, 2005 - April 27, 2007

My Special Little Puppy
You were in my arms
Such a short time
But will be in my heart
Forever.
 

Koa was born on July 1st in Morgan Hill, California, with four siblings that all went on to show careers. Koa was the runt of the litter and was through to be too small. He surprised us by growing to be well within the standard, and beautiful.

I wasn't sure at the time if I was ready for another puppy and didn't even take Koa home the first time I saw him. But two days later, after thinking about him constantly, I went back on a starry night (Koa always loved to bark at the stars) and picked him up and took him home! I was so happy and proud of this little bundle of fur sleeping in my lap all the way back to Half Moon Bay I knew it was meant to be for some reason. Three weeks after having him in our home we did our fourth in vitro and I became pregnant with twins. Koa had brought me out of my depression and had made it possible for my mind and body to conceive my babies and to carry them to full term.

Koa was a great little puppy and we did everything to try to have him grow up to be a well "socialized" doggie. He attended three puppy schools, met tons of new people every week and had so many doggie friends I can't even count them all. He was a happy, free spirited little guy who cared about nothing except having fun! An afternoon at the beach with all of his friends was his idea of a great day. He loved to chase the birds, roll in seaweed and just get dirty. He was so funny to watch. He wanted to chase anything that moved or at least bark at it. He never met a doggie or kitty that wasn't his friend. He was a very independent little boy that loved his food or treats or anything he thought smelled good. He once ate some of the babies' diaper cream.

But Koa's life changed a bit after Keola and Kanoa were born. He wasn't the only baby anymore and he started to be a bit more naughty but it didn't matter, I did the best I could with my three babies. As soon as I was able to I took them all on long walks to the beach, and spent as much time as possible with them all. I decided not to return to work and we started to plan our move back to Hawaii where all of our families lived. Koa continued to have play dates with his doggie friends until our move to Hawaii. It was a difficult time but I thought things would be better with family around.

In March 2007 we moved back to Hawaii and tried to get settled. Koa joined us on April 3rd since that was the date he was able to come into the state without having to go into quarantine. We planned our whole move around this date and Koa. I wanted him to be happy so I set up play dates with other dogs we knew. The first dog Koa met was my friend's dog, Poipu, but that didn't work out too well because Poipu wasn't used to playing with other dogs. So I took him to my mom's neighbor's house to play with their dog Hapu and they hit it off great. They ran and played and I think they had fun together. We went to the park in the evenings with Hapu and her owner as often as we could... little did we know our time was short.

One night, three weeks after Koa came to Hawaii he woke up in the middle of the night coughing. I had heard that kind of cough before when my fourteen year old Sheltie died and so I became very scared. I tried to find an all night emergency vet but couldn't reach anyone. I waited until the morning and called the local vet, with whom ironically I had an appointment later that day to look at a little sore on Koa's foot that wasn't healing. Maybe this was my only sign something was not right with Koa until his cough. The vet took a chest X-ray at my request and when I saw his face my heart just dropped into my stomach. He told me there was fluid building up in Koa's lungs which could possibly be pneumonia but he wasn't sure. He told me I needed to take Koa to a specialist clinic and made an appointment for me at 4:00 pm. I couldn't wait until 4:00 pm because I felt I needed to go as soon as possible and I was just waiting around for my little dog to die. I got to the second vet around 2:00 and after another chest x-ray she looked very worried. She asked me if Koa could have gotten into something. Of course I said no right away, how could he have. But then I thought about all the play time Koa had had with Hapu in their yard and so I finally told her "maybe". We left Koa at around 6:00 pm to go and take care of my two little boys and when we got to my mom's house the neighbor was outside. I asked her about rat poison and if they had it in their yard. The husband confirmed they had had some out when Koa first started coming over and he had noticed it was gone. I went back to see Koa at 8:30 pm and he was in an oxygen crate with an IV, antibiotics, and probably pain killing medication as well. He looked o.k. but the prognosis wasn't good. He was given a 50/50% chance of pulling through. I stayed with him until 10:00 pm and as I left I looked at him once more and told him "please hold on and I'll see you tomorrow". The phone rang at 11:15 pm and Koa was gone. My poor little Koa was gone. I can't even begin to explain my pain and grief so I won't even try. It is still with me to this day.

Now I sit here nearly one year later and cry because I miss him and what should have been. I wanted my little boys to grow up with Koa as their best friend and now they will only know him in photos. They say his name when they see a photo of him and it breaks my heart. I have cried so many tears over the past year for this little bundle of joy who in a sense gave me my little boys. I am angry at the neighbors for being so negligent as to put out rat poison in an open container with dogs in their yard, their own one of them. They are lucky to still have Hapu. I am sad Koa had to die the way he did. I hope he wasn't in pain but I will never know.

By the way "KOA" is a Hawaiian name the means "Brave", "Bold" and "Fearless". Koa lived up to his name in life as well as in death never letting on that he was sick or not feeling well until the very end. Although if he would have shown me he was ill earlier I might have been able to save him but for some reason it wasn't meant to be. He was meant to be with me but only for a short time. He was truly just borrowed to me from God himself. He was a gift.

I thought of you with love today
But that is nothing new
I thought about you yesterday
And days before that too
I think of you in silence
I often speak your name
All I have are memories
Your picture in a frame
Your memory is my keepsake
With which I'll never part
God has you in his keeping
I have you in my heart
They say memories are golden
Well maybe that is true
I never wanted memories
I only wanted you

~ Author Unknown ~

Thank you, Koa, for being part of my life.
I love you today, tomorrow and forever.

Khani